This is a song of my past. Every time when Bryan Adams started with that "Oh, thinking about all our younger years...” I used to feel so sad that all my close friends were so far away in Taiwan. Although I have lost contact with so many friends throughout the years, I have made new ones as well. Somehow, no matter how many friends I have made or how many years I have been here, once a while, my heart still aches whenever I hear the song play on the radio.
I have been in Canada for a while and have made this place my home. For those people who have left your home countries and have been far from friends and family for years, maybe some of you can understand my sentiment here. I sometimes feel like I just don't belong to a particular place anymore, a misfit. When you situate yourself in a foreign land, no matter how long you have been in the place, you are always looked upon as an immigrant from afar, an outsider. I know I have made this country my home, but once a while, I have this romantic thought about the rosy past in Taiwan. I miss my past and everything old. I love Taiwan.
The truth of the matter is I probably would miss Canada if I were in Taiwan right now. I love Canada, too! Last time when I was in Taiwan, I could sense that I was treated as a guest in my own country. The sense of belonging has gradually faded. Sometimes I wonder if my world in Taiwan has changed to the point that I can not recognize or relate to any longer. It simply has become a completely different reality from the memory of my past. I have close attachment to both places, but I also feel that I don’t belong to either. I am merely a passenger through time.
A few days ago, an old classmate accidently came across my blog and got in touch with me. I was so excited to hear from an old pal from the past. Through blogging, I am also getting in touch with people, strangers, schoolmates and acquaintances alike, whom I would have no way of communicating years ago. I am grateful and also cherish deeply for this kind of special encounters. The world at large is suddenly only a click away on my desk by my coffee.
The following song is Heaven by Bryan Adams and a remake mixed by DJ Sammy and Yanou. This song is dedicated to all my friends, new and old, out there.