My Corner for Education

The other day when I was at a party, I met an old acquaintance, named R. I have known R for about 11 years. I remember we played basketball together once in a co-ed type of team. The guys were surprised to find out that I played like a Desperado. (hehehe) After that game, they never forget about my basketball skills and “my feisty spirit”. (They still often talk about that game.) Well, I always have to clarify that it is not easy to play with guys, especially, with guys who are much taller than me. (Note 1) The world is not designed for shorter people! Nature has not been kind to us, OK! (Sigh….)

Anyway, good old R still looked the same that day, not much has changed, and he is still SINGLE! Over the years, my friends (the host and the hostess) have been trying their best to introduce single ladies to their best friend R, but all in vain. R is not a picky kind of guy, either. In fact, he should be surrounded by lovely young ladies in my view! He is very handy with a decent look and a superb engineer job working for an energy company. So, what’s wrong with him?

We got to talk about this “dating” issue at the party. He mentioned that where he works is a predominantly male plant, full of engineers and production workers. The work place is not an ideal environment for him to meet the opposite sex. He seems to have other responsibilities at home because he is caring for his aging parents with his sister who is also single. It is simply not easy to find someone who would have the patience to complement him. The oversea Chinese circle is very small and simply does not have “resources” for him to find that special someone. I guess, over the years, my friends have been trying to find ladies from all different ethnic backgrounds for him. Maybe, those ladies are not what he has been hoping for.

It seems to be a modern societal problem for young people who are no longer into the partying or bar-hopping crowds. I heard this rumour, “One in eight couples met through Internet dating service in North America.” I call it a rumour because I have no source to verify it. However, I see it as a by-product of a progressing modern society where people are so caught up in their busy everyday life trying to secure a path to a successful career. By the time they are ready to settle down, they simply have missed many opportunities. If they were lucky (or unlucky) to be able to find someone early on, by this stage, they sometimes have to face another problem, so called “growing apart”. If they were civil, they would depart in a peaceful manner. If not, nasty things could evolve from the sour ending.

For whatever reasons, I feel for this type of lonely people around the world. No wonder, Internet becomes such a convenient tool for many to seek a companion through that route. R told me that one of his co-workers found someone through an online dating service after his divorce. The girl he met happens to live on the same street not too far from him. After they have dated for a while, now they are planning to get married. Without the Internet, they would not have ever met despite that they have lived on the same street for years and even jogged by each other’s houses every day.

Nothing wrong with Internet dating! It actually is a very creative invention for a significant number of people who normally would not have the opportunities to meet, to finally find someone. Look at the number of long distance dating. They work if both parties are willing to commit to the relationship. I went through a long distance courting myself, so I truly believe that it could be successful and lead to a happy relationship. It is just ironic that the expansion of our modern society actually reduces the channels for human connection. Instead, many people have to turn to a data searching machine and program to look for a soul mate.

I have a beautiful sister who is in her 30’s and still single living in Taiwan. She is facing the same thing that R is going through here. She had a couple of boyfriends when she was in her twenties but the relationships were short lived. Now, she is an accountant and works in a department where there are predominantly females. She works long hours and constantly upgrades her skills and credentials at her spare time in order to maintain her job security. She simply has no time to meet somebody new!

My husband always says, “If she was here in Canada, she would be snatched up in a minute. And what’s wrong with the young men in Taiwan?!” Well, I guess the young men in Taiwan want to pursue younger and prettier girls. In fact, it is not just young men in Taiwan. It is about young men and women everywhere, or shall we say it is the “animal nature” (Note 2). People seem to chase after younger superficial beauty, and they often miss the inner gem hidden in a true beauty. (Note 3) The perception of beauty somehow follows the fashionable trends as well. When a relationship is established based on the appearance and other superficial factors, the foundation for the relationship would be on the shaky ground to begin with. No wonder many marriages nowadays are in crisis.

For some, they often sum up their lonely single life as the result of their fate and destiny. I see it as a way to comfort themselves and to maintain some sort of hopes for the future possibilities of love. Singles around the world just need more opportunities, need to seize the opportunities, and need to create opportunities. And, when all have failed, let’s try the “probability” of Internet. There will be endless probabilities on line. Why not!

I don’t know any young man who is single in their late 30’s in Taiwan for my sister. But, wait a minute, R is available except that he is in Canada. Anyway, at the party, I told R that maybe I should let him match up with my sister. I will then encourage my sister to come for a visit. Why not try some creative long distance MSN dating! I was quite happy to come up with this creative idea myself. Anyway, I was too busy to get his email address after the party. I bugged my friend for her to give me R’s email address. A few days later, my friend (the hostess for the party) called me up to tell me that R just got a new job offer that day. He is moving to Italy in a month, and he will remain there for two years to oversee a massive project. Woops, is that fate or destiny? Bummer! (Note 4)


Post Notes:
1. Well, I have not grown much taller since the sixth grade. Sigh….

2. We are very much into studying anthropology. (hehehe)

3. Maybe that was why I had truck loads of guy friends but they only treated me as one of their best buddies. They counted on my good nature to help them pursue their girlfriends (my friends), but they somehow ignored me! What’s wrong with me? (I am not implying that I was too ugly to be snatched, am I? hahaha) Anyway, whenever this conversation comes up, my Da-Pong always says that the young men in Taiwan were too blind to discover me. So, that’s why he was so lucky. Mmmm. I like that kind of sweet talk. Hehehe.

4. Whoever knows a decent looking single young male aged 35 to 45 in Taiwan is welcome to contact me. Please leave a concealed note with a contact email address and information in my guestbook. Only sincere applicants need to apply, PLEASE!